April 11, 2012

No Goats No Glory

I'm bored out of my skull, I didn't really plan to post anything specific today and, although I did listen to a bunch of new stuff today, most of it sucked and isn't worth posting about anyway. Instead, I figured I'd post a bunch of goat metal bands I like and maybe see if anyone else has any favorite goat bands. This is a bad day for me and this is what we're doing, so if you're not up for it, door's over there. Okay? Good!

Goatsnake is a California stoner doom band formed 1996, after the disbanding of The Obsessed (who will reunite for this year's Roadburn festival) and it consists of The Obsessed members Greg Rogers and Guy Pinhas on drums and bass, respectively, as well as vocalist Pete Stahl and Greg Anderson, who also plays guitar in the monolithic Sunn O))). A pretty cool line-up if you ask me, especially considering that Greg Anderson probably uses the same rig he drones with to play sweet bluesy doom for Goatsnake. Also, Pete Stahl's vocals are really nice. They've only released two studio albums so far, but they're well worth checking out if the line-up made you raise an eyebrow.

Archgoat are a trver-than-thou unholy black metal outfit from Finland. There's only three dudes in the band and they go by the names of Angelslayer, Ritual Butcher and Sinisterror. Their latest offering is an EP called Heavenly Vulva (Christ's Last Rites) and the cover art depicts Mother Mary cowgirling Jesus' corpse on a mortuary table, so I guess there's no point in describing their music. The imagery and song titles speak for themselves.

I've talked about Goatwhore before, the blackened death metal band formed in the wake of sludge legend Acid Bath's demise. They're awesome, in a vitriolic, pissed-off kinda way.

Weregoat are similar to Archgoat, in that they play vicious, bestial black metal with a thrashy edge and they sport names like Indiscriminate Impregnator, Nocturnal Hellfuker and Sadoseducer. They've only released one EP so far, called Unholy Exaltation of Fullmoon Perversity. If you enjoy blasphemous black metal with vocals so drenched in reverb that they sound like a pack of hellish fiends throwing a party in a cave, Weregoat should be right up your alley.

Goatvomit are an obscure black metal band from Greece that sing about destroying Christianity with nuclear missiles. The video below, though, is the intro to their 2002 EP called Chapel of the Winds of Belial, and I've always had a soft spot for the cheesy keyboards and the clean, spoken vocals it features.

The ludicrously-named Goat Penis hail from Brazil and they're a bunch of guys who obsess over anything that has to do with war, so expect to find a whole bunch of songs about tanks, nuclear warheads, machine  guns and bazookas on their albums, with relentless drumming, crunchy riffage and, for some reason, ski masks.

Finally, we have Von Goat, an off-shoot of the legendary US black metal outfit, Von. Nothing too special going on here - just well-executed, thick, sludgy black metal.

This is where my limited expertise on goat metal ends. There's also Goat Thrower, Goat Eater, Goat Messiah, Goat Puncher, Goat River, Goat Skull, Goat Perversion, Goat Tunnel, Goat Terrorism, Goat Vengeance, Goat Bleeder, Goat Command, Goat Funeral, Goat Semen and a whole fuckload of other goat-something bands I've never heard of. If there's a goat band I should TOTALLY check out, give me a heads-up in the comments. 



  1. Check the death/grindcore band 'Milking The Goatmachine'

  2. Thanks for the rec, will do :)

  3. And Nuclear Holocausto's first band called Goat Vulva

  4. Hahaha, always interested in Beherit trivia.

  5. I'm charging $1.25 a day for the use of the "who cares" tag.

  6. ...shit.

    Do you accept paypal?