July 23, 2013

SUMMER GORE FEAST: The Tale of a Magical Night with Fucking EXHUMED and Friends


SUMMER GORE FEAST - this was the tagline of possibly the hottest summer party of 2013, hosted by Private Hell club in Bucharest and organized by the wonderful Mihai "Coro" Caraveteanu, who we all know and love. I made it a point to make it to this show right after it was announced, while I was still 800 kilometers away from the Romanian capital. When fucking Exhumed come to visit, you'd better fucking show up! 

I spent the hours leading up to the show taking part in some good old G-rated activities with a lovely lady friend: we went to a chic French brasserie and enjoyed a rasberry mille-feuille, after which we visited the National Art Museum and gawked at a lot of religious art and works by famous Romanian painters. Not to mention we saw a Monet (or was it Manet?) painting down at the European section of the gallery. How cool is that? 
Okay, moving on...

Time slid by fast and before I knew it, it was 7 PM and I was hanging out in a near empty Private Hell, after bidding my friend goodbye and doing a quick change of clothes in the club's bathroom (I wasn't dressed br00tal enough, as you may have guessed). Getting there one full hour before the doors even officially opened meant that I got to enjoy a beer, the nice surroundings and the lads from Exhumed doing their soundcheck, which included some choice cuts from Backstreet Boys, which I thought was really funny. Backstreet's back, alright!

Eventually, the show opened with the Bulgarian skit-warriors Fecal Body Incorporated, who delivered a solid guttural goregrind performance which caused quite a bit of headbanging. Not from me, obviously, as I was still plunked down on my bar stool like a piece of shit, still tired from walking up and down all those stairs in the National Gallery. But I enjoyed watching the band perform anyway. I'm guessing they played a lot of stuff from their latest album, Brown Love. More power to them. 


Once the Bulgarians got off the stage, I went outside for a fresh breath of air. Obviously, all of my hard-ass bros were loitering outside like leeches, drinking beer bought from the corner shop and displaying a very bestial death behavior. I went to say hi, I grabbed a beer and yadda yadda yadda, I pretty much missed the entire Krow show, the surprise band of the evening, after the local death metal band from my city cancelled their appearance for unknown reasons. I caught their last song of the evening, but I was way in the back and it all sounded very muddy. Back outside, jerk!


And now we come to the treat of the evening - Exhumed! These fucking guys, man. They RIPPED! I don't even know for how long or how many songs they played, but it was fucking great. In addition to their tight performance and playing stuff from all over their discography, their stage game was ace. There was a guy waving a chainsaw around and killing dudes with it. It was Bud Burke's birthday that evening, so we all sang Happy Birthday to him. He teared through a scorching solo, after which he died. The chainsaw guy was back with a defibrillator and, after trying unsuccessfully to "revive" him, he pulled out the best medicine of all: a beer, which he poured down Burke's throat until he made a full recovery. Obscene Extreme 2013 sampler CDs were offered generously to the audience. A bloody severed head was thrown about with great joy. Not to mention, a real fucking wedding suite just happened to drop by the show. No idea who thought bringing a young bride to a goregrind show would be a good thing to do, but hey, they did it anyway. 

All in all, it was a BLAST! 

After the show, the dudes in Exhumed didn't retreat to their private quarters like some spoiled celebrities, but instead went outside to have some beers and chat with their fans. I never imagined I'd get to hang out with fucking Exhumed, but it happened, because they're chill, down to earth guys. And that made me happy. 
Pleasant fellows

The show had ended, but the night was far from over. The party carried on in Andrei Headcheese's crib until morning, with more beer and more death metal, until I passed out on a chair and woke up to a hazy and hot July day. The sun was shining furiously. I had a quick breakfast consisting of yogurt and a croissant (still keeping it hardcore), had some much needed water and a godly shower and stepped out into the eerily desolate Bucharest once again.

After Saturday's massacre, some more family-friendly activities were in order, like eating at McDonald's and taking a walk through the beautiful botanical garden (more like a huge park with all sorts of trees and plants). My special friend joined me again and we spent a wonderful afternoon together. A quick beer in the evening with TZEEEAC friend, resident artist and hardcore aficionado Volo - who gave me his band's demo CD as a gift, thanks again bro! - rounded off a perfect weekend. Then, it was time for the long (actually, totally okay) road back home...

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